How to live?

I needed to write some things down. I have not been doing so well lately. I am not going to sugarcoat this, I feel pretty messed up. Losing my mother, not being able to move forward in life, making wrong decisions and not making any decisions at all is causing me to have some serious breakdowns. I am diagnosed with depression, which has a lot to do with the mourning proces I am still going through even though mom died 3 years and 15 days ago. Maybe depression has always been lurking but never had the chance to really catch me but it finally did. It really gives me the idea I don't know how to live life anymore. How do people do "life"? I can't even get up in the morning and take care of myself. I just get out of bed and go straight to the couch were I lay all day. I stay in my PJ's, I don't shower, don't brush my teeth for days. It's disgusting, I know. I feel disgusting and it's no fun, I don't want to do this... All I want is to live a normal and happy life where I balance work, family, friends and fun just like any other human being. But then again, I don't know if anyone has it figured out. Maybe everyone has to go through some shit at one point. It makes me think about those cheesy romantic Hollywood movies where in the beginning everything is fine and then everything gets messed up. In the end, everything always turns out even better. Maybe I just have to wait a little, my "sad part" is going on right now and it will not last forever. I just really hope it will be over soon..